Who am I Really?

It is noon and it is my day off. I was being lazy and not getting done what I had planned on for the day. I decided to sit down and watch something on TV. I and our family enjoy the Hallmark channel and as an old fan of Little House on the Prairie I figured I'd catch an episode of it.

I turned the TV to channel 75, Saved by an Angel was on. I have always enjoyed the show and today was a really good episode. It was about a church that was having the dedication for their new teen center. It was a busy day for the pastor and he was being pulled here and there and everywhere. There was a young gal who needed to talk with him and he was so busy that he put her off and asked if they could talk tomorrow. He was too busy. The pastor's son saw her steal some money raised at the fund raiser for the teen center. He chased after her and walked her home and talked with her. He found out she was having some serious issues.

A reporter had asked the pastor earlier to do a story on him, his family, and the teen center. When his son ran off to help his friend and wasn't there for the dedication the pastor became agitated about it. When his son called to say where he was the pastor jumped in his car to go retrieve him and at the same time his son and his son's friend was on their way to the teen center. They ended up crashing into one another and his son was killed. The pastor faith was shaken and he blamed God and wanted to know why God took his son. An angel, Monica, explained to him that now is when he needed his faith the most. The pastor called himself a phoney. He said he preached about God, trust in him and turn to him in times of trouble for strength. When in a crisis he didn't practice what he preached. She helped him regain his faith and trust that there was only good to come from such tragedy. He told his congregation at his son's funeral that he hoped to live up to his son's example.

I guess the reason I went through the trouble of telling you about this episode is because it reminded me on how I need to work on my faith. I need weekly and even daily reminders that I need to trust not in my own understanding and that I need to rely on him. In the good times I don't praise him, but in the bad times I always ask his help. When times are neither good nor bad I catch myself not acting in a very Christian manner. I want to be a better example than that to my kids and I want to be a better person.

You have to be totally insane to believe that the earth and everything around it was created by a big explosion in space. Do me a favor, take some clay, put firecrackers in it and light them. You know what you'll have? A mess. Now watch a potter and see what they can do with that clay. It takes a master potter to make something beautiful from it.

I like to hunt. Go hunting and watch the sun rise over the hills on a cool fall morning as you see that beautiful buck walk across the meadow. Now tell me there is no God. I watched my children being born and was the first to touch my youngest boy's head. Now tell me there is no God. The mountains, the seas, children laughing, tell me there is no God. I saw a bald eagle on day when I was delivering by Rhame. In all it's majesty and beauty I knew there is a God.

If you live a good life, believe in him, and accept him you have no regrets in life. If you don't believe and think you're going to hell. You life will have been wasted. This is a truth that I believe. I am not perfect and far from a good example, but I am a testiment to God's grace and mercy. I deserve nothing, but have everything. If you have a family that loves you, you have everything. You can live an empty life without him or a full life with him. Ask my 90 year old father what his take is on this. He told me the good Lord has been very good to him. So this is where you ask yourself. Who am I really?